[ there's much of xiao hua in many of hua cheng's mannerism. after all, he was born xiao hua and has become more through painstaking effort, that nature lingering at the bottom of him and in his instinctive reactions. that's why he enjoys the petting, especially behind his ears, as much as he used to, and also why he tilts his head curiously, just like a feline, while he tries and read xie lian through their connection, the shadow of a smile playing on his lips.
he can sense the other's content, placid feelings and he basks into them happily, in turn feeding their bond through that infinite loop. the way the older smiles so openly at his question leaves him surprised, blinking at him like one would be in the sun, trying to get used to all that unrestrained, beautiful light: that's xie lian's smile, even prettier than sunbeams. it makes hua cheng's heart skip a beat and he shyly looks away, because he feels too happy, nearly giddy and it's so foreign. warmth reaches his every nerve ending and floods him, leaving him breathless.
how can someone as beautiful as xie lian exist? and how can someone as unworthy as hua cheng be allowed to witness such a gorgeous smile from him? he can't allow himself to think that maybe that smile was caused by himself, or else he'll combust.
hua cheng plays with his fingers and the fabric of xie lian's robe while the other untangles his hair, glancing at him every now and then, like a shy child. they're so close his scent is stark and so his warmth. his fingers make him scalp tingle even if they're working along the length of his locks. hua cheng has never been so nervous, an innocent, anticipating type of nervousness.
he looks a little curious again when he feels gratitude coming from xie lian and he tries and scan his face for answers, but then the other talks and he forgets all about it. ]
I don't care about my hair... I want to keep it the way gege likes it. [ he confesses softly. by how overjoyed xie lian is to style it, he seems to have an answer on whether or not he should cut it.
he's confused when he's made to hold his hair and he almost stops doing it when the other scrambles off the bed. hua cheng's eyes widen and he nearly reaches out to pick him up from the floor, just to see his indestructible gege rush off to the nightstand again. it makes hua cheng laugh softly. his master is truly an unstoppable force.
he's quite curious about what had him so excited and his mismatched eyes do get crossed while trying to put into focus what xie lian is showing him so close. a flower? yes, his master used to love flowers as much as artifacts, he remembers that. but... how could pretty flowers suit him? hua cheng hunches a little in his shoulders, insecure. ]
Gege... won't those flowers be wasted on someone like me? [ he asks quietly. they would fit a beauty like xie lian without any effort. but not him.
his concerns fizzle away, though, in the face of xie lian's sudden sadness. hua cheng feels the deep sorrow, enough to shatter his breath in two and have his heart crumble. it's such pain, such longing, all at once. it hurts so much. it's sadness for things and people lost, one hua cheng never personally felt, because nobody besides his master ever dared getting close enough to him. but the familiar knows sorrow in and out. he hopes that, through their connection, that pain will weigh a little less on xie lian's shoulders.
large hands rub soothingly at the other's knees and up along his thighs, quietly saying, i am here, you are not alone anymore, i am with you. ]
...do I look okay? [ he asks, quiet and conscious, when xie lian has finished his work and pulls back just enough to look at it. hua cheng chances a peek at the older, before looking down again. he takes his hands now and kisses the knuckles of both: those holy, skilled hands.
he infuses his power into the flowers, fixing any possible crease or broken petal, making them bloom at the best of their abilities, color brighter. he can only hope he looks decent enough for his master to want to lay eyes on him. ]
Thank you, gege. [ he smiles shyly, nearly childlike, before he fills the distance between them to press a chaste kiss to the corner of his mouth. ]
( the recoil from hua cheng feeling xie lian's sadness is new and distinct. it compels xie lian to bury that sadness deeper, to somehow be more mindful even on a subconscious level to not let any discomfort or unhappiness through, lest he hurt him. mostly, this is not too difficult, xie lian having made the stalwart decision to try to focus on that which is good: enough food to eat, a day without bizarrely terrible mishaps, a companion who thanks him even if he doesn't need to. so when xie lian smiles at him, it is soft and sincere, reaching out to frame his face with both hands even as hua cheng kisses him and murmuring, )
It suits you perfectly, San Lang. You make them look better.
( and, not just through their bond but through his behavior, xie lian notes a kind of shyness in his familiar, even as he watches with calm admiration as the flowers seem to revive brighter and softer than they were even originally. he doesn't know why his familiar emanates this shyness and a sort of sense of unworthiness, but it feels intrusive to ask, so he just lets one hand slide from his face to curl reassuringly on his shoulder, the other going to pet again behind his ear: you're good, don't worry, you're good. all the while, he relaxes a little even in hua cheng's lap as he is, the weight of his hands a curious comfort xie lian feels foreign to. maybe he is too reassured, because a dizzy spell sweeps through him, this one softer than the one that had flooded him on the surge of hua cheng's magic. he blinks slowly before gently resting his fore head to hua cheng's shoulder, soft breaths warm and a little shallow against the bare skin.
it's not like he's uneducated in the terms of familiars and how they work, the many ways. but it has been a long time since he thought about it at all, much less the broad spectrum of manners in which these bonds can manifest and develop upon meeting. some of it is the residual and stark contrast of going from nearly no magic, to much too much, to something idling closer to the former again yet buzzing with the latter. )
Sorry...San Lang...
( he means to say that he just needs a moment, but he ends up just focusing on breathing, the hand on hua cheng's shoulder sliding down and curling affectionately around his braid, mindful of the flowers. and he has the thought again, perplexing: how familiar hua cheng feels. his presence. his voice. his scent. the still lingering taste of him that cannot be chalked up to solely a matter of being his familiar. like he's met him before, too long ago to remember.
even with the odd wave of tiredness, xie lian's whole emotional demeanor inside and out is calm, disciplinedly so. all he wants hua cheng to feel is that he is cared for and accepted. he genuinely feels other people will love him too, given the chance, but starting with xie lian himself is something. )
[ xie lian has indeed met him before, both as a cat and as more than that. hua cheng had already gathered enough power to serve him as a human youth, back in the day. it'd been centuries before and he made sure he kept his face hidden, especially his eye of misfortune, and so there's no blaming xie lian for not recognizing him. if anything, the notion that he feels familiar to his master, the feeling lingering like a puzzling mystery in their bond, overjoys him. that he left an impression at all, how lucky.
xie lian's sudden dizziness, though, can't help worrying him, his whole mind clearing of any thought. the initial wave of magic must've been hard to bear through: is this sudden feeling of sickness related to that, or is it because the other is once again devoid of it, now that it's swum back to hua cheng?
either way, it is entirely his fault and hua cheng sighs deeply, a frown in place. he hugs him gently to his chest, ignoring the feigning of calm. he can look past appearances and that's a gift, because xie lian is sadly too apt at hiding pain and discomfort: hua cheng would never notice them, if they didn't have this thread connecting their souls.
cradled that smaller frame in his arms, hua cheng lays down, on his side, carrying him with him. he adjusts the pillow underneath him with his nose and by dragging the corner with his teeth, like he would've done as a cat, as he keeps hugging him protectively. one hand leaves him for barely a moment just to tug the covers on top of them, fixing them especially on the older. he kisses his forehead and the bridge of his nose and his bangs. ]
Gege, I'm here with you. There's no need to pretend. [ he whispers, tone soft and warm. if only xie lian could trust him with everything he is and everything he feels. he doesn't want to be shielded from the real him. ]
Whatever you need, I can give it to you. [ he can look after him, treat him, protect him. that's what he's gathered so much power for; the sole, entire reason. ] You can rest. There's nothing to worry about. [ he mumbles in his ear, deep voice full and soft, just like those caresses that are being rubbed in his narrow back. ]
Once the sun is up, I'll still be here with you. You won't wake up alone ever again. [ it's like a lullaby, trying to soothe xie lian enough for sleep. hua cheng technically doesn't need it and so he'll watch over him.
hopefully the other's frame will be able to get used to the fluctuations of power come morning. he doesn't want to make xie lian sick anymore. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
he can sense the other's content, placid feelings and he basks into them happily, in turn feeding their bond through that infinite loop. the way the older smiles so openly at his question leaves him surprised, blinking at him like one would be in the sun, trying to get used to all that unrestrained, beautiful light: that's xie lian's smile, even prettier than sunbeams. it makes hua cheng's heart skip a beat and he shyly looks away, because he feels too happy, nearly giddy and it's so foreign. warmth reaches his every nerve ending and floods him, leaving him breathless.
how can someone as beautiful as xie lian exist? and how can someone as unworthy as hua cheng be allowed to witness such a gorgeous smile from him? he can't allow himself to think that maybe that smile was caused by himself, or else he'll combust.
hua cheng plays with his fingers and the fabric of xie lian's robe while the other untangles his hair, glancing at him every now and then, like a shy child. they're so close his scent is stark and so his warmth. his fingers make him scalp tingle even if they're working along the length of his locks. hua cheng has never been so nervous, an innocent, anticipating type of nervousness.
he looks a little curious again when he feels gratitude coming from xie lian and he tries and scan his face for answers, but then the other talks and he forgets all about it. ]
I don't care about my hair... I want to keep it the way gege likes it. [ he confesses softly. by how overjoyed xie lian is to style it, he seems to have an answer on whether or not he should cut it.
he's confused when he's made to hold his hair and he almost stops doing it when the other scrambles off the bed. hua cheng's eyes widen and he nearly reaches out to pick him up from the floor, just to see his indestructible gege rush off to the nightstand again. it makes hua cheng laugh softly. his master is truly an unstoppable force.
he's quite curious about what had him so excited and his mismatched eyes do get crossed while trying to put into focus what xie lian is showing him so close. a flower? yes, his master used to love flowers as much as artifacts, he remembers that. but... how could pretty flowers suit him? hua cheng hunches a little in his shoulders, insecure. ]
Gege... won't those flowers be wasted on someone like me? [ he asks quietly. they would fit a beauty like xie lian without any effort. but not him.
his concerns fizzle away, though, in the face of xie lian's sudden sadness. hua cheng feels the deep sorrow, enough to shatter his breath in two and have his heart crumble. it's such pain, such longing, all at once. it hurts so much. it's sadness for things and people lost, one hua cheng never personally felt, because nobody besides his master ever dared getting close enough to him. but the familiar knows sorrow in and out. he hopes that, through their connection, that pain will weigh a little less on xie lian's shoulders.
large hands rub soothingly at the other's knees and up along his thighs, quietly saying, i am here, you are not alone anymore, i am with you. ]
...do I look okay? [ he asks, quiet and conscious, when xie lian has finished his work and pulls back just enough to look at it. hua cheng chances a peek at the older, before looking down again. he takes his hands now and kisses the knuckles of both: those holy, skilled hands.
he infuses his power into the flowers, fixing any possible crease or broken petal, making them bloom at the best of their abilities, color brighter. he can only hope he looks decent enough for his master to want to lay eyes on him. ]
Thank you, gege. [ he smiles shyly, nearly childlike, before he fills the distance between them to press a chaste kiss to the corner of his mouth. ]
no subject
It suits you perfectly, San Lang. You make them look better.
( and, not just through their bond but through his behavior, xie lian notes a kind of shyness in his familiar, even as he watches with calm admiration as the flowers seem to revive brighter and softer than they were even originally. he doesn't know why his familiar emanates this shyness and a sort of sense of unworthiness, but it feels intrusive to ask, so he just lets one hand slide from his face to curl reassuringly on his shoulder, the other going to pet again behind his ear: you're good, don't worry, you're good. all the while, he relaxes a little even in hua cheng's lap as he is, the weight of his hands a curious comfort xie lian feels foreign to. maybe he is too reassured, because a dizzy spell sweeps through him, this one softer than the one that had flooded him on the surge of hua cheng's magic. he blinks slowly before gently resting his fore head to hua cheng's shoulder, soft breaths warm and a little shallow against the bare skin.
it's not like he's uneducated in the terms of familiars and how they work, the many ways. but it has been a long time since he thought about it at all, much less the broad spectrum of manners in which these bonds can manifest and develop upon meeting. some of it is the residual and stark contrast of going from nearly no magic, to much too much, to something idling closer to the former again yet buzzing with the latter. )
Sorry...San Lang...
( he means to say that he just needs a moment, but he ends up just focusing on breathing, the hand on hua cheng's shoulder sliding down and curling affectionately around his braid, mindful of the flowers. and he has the thought again, perplexing: how familiar hua cheng feels. his presence. his voice. his scent. the still lingering taste of him that cannot be chalked up to solely a matter of being his familiar. like he's met him before, too long ago to remember.
even with the odd wave of tiredness, xie lian's whole emotional demeanor inside and out is calm, disciplinedly so. all he wants hua cheng to feel is that he is cared for and accepted. he genuinely feels other people will love him too, given the chance, but starting with xie lian himself is something. )
no subject
xie lian's sudden dizziness, though, can't help worrying him, his whole mind clearing of any thought. the initial wave of magic must've been hard to bear through: is this sudden feeling of sickness related to that, or is it because the other is once again devoid of it, now that it's swum back to hua cheng?
either way, it is entirely his fault and hua cheng sighs deeply, a frown in place. he hugs him gently to his chest, ignoring the feigning of calm. he can look past appearances and that's a gift, because xie lian is sadly too apt at hiding pain and discomfort: hua cheng would never notice them, if they didn't have this thread connecting their souls.
cradled that smaller frame in his arms, hua cheng lays down, on his side, carrying him with him. he adjusts the pillow underneath him with his nose and by dragging the corner with his teeth, like he would've done as a cat, as he keeps hugging him protectively. one hand leaves him for barely a moment just to tug the covers on top of them, fixing them especially on the older. he kisses his forehead and the bridge of his nose and his bangs. ]
Gege, I'm here with you. There's no need to pretend. [ he whispers, tone soft and warm. if only xie lian could trust him with everything he is and everything he feels. he doesn't want to be shielded from the real him. ]
Whatever you need, I can give it to you. [ he can look after him, treat him, protect him. that's what he's gathered so much power for; the sole, entire reason. ] You can rest. There's nothing to worry about. [ he mumbles in his ear, deep voice full and soft, just like those caresses that are being rubbed in his narrow back. ]
Once the sun is up, I'll still be here with you. You won't wake up alone ever again. [ it's like a lullaby, trying to soothe xie lian enough for sleep. hua cheng technically doesn't need it and so he'll watch over him.
hopefully the other's frame will be able to get used to the fluctuations of power come morning. he doesn't want to make xie lian sick anymore. ]