( if xie lian were less dizzy and strangely overwrought, he would be more pursuing of that response, even with how steadily hua cheng delivers it. but for now he accepts, a pleasantness to how hua cheng pulls him along and lets him be close. where normally this amount of contact would send him scrambling, and indeed his heart is racing almost alarmingly fast, even a slight shift that brings them briefly apart causes a twinge that only makes xie lian curl closer, as if they have swapped roles and he is now the cat.
that said, even then, his hand continues to pet through hua cheng's hair, some unconscious and determined desire to soothe. he only stumbles in it when he hears those words, and it is enough to ignore the repeated feeling of no in his blood and nerves as he sits up, which somehow ends with his knees on either side of hua cheng's waist. both of his hands are careful to avoid his hair this time, braced shakily on either side of his head as he looks at him, not frowning exactly but a little sad. it's an odd look probably, because his skin remains flushed pink and his eyes a little blown out, feverish with magic, their connection, and a physical longing so foreign to him he can't even name it.
but his focus is xiao hua. hua cheng. punish? he shifts more of his weight to one hand so he can use the other to, as if hua cheng were very fragile, traipse his fingertips down his jaw and then just frame his face. )
Why would I punish you? You're not lacking at all. Xiao H-- er... Hua Cheng, ( he blushes new when he says his name proper again, because he can feel the thrum of pleasure it induces both ways. his hand stays on his face but his gaze averts, murmuring, a bit flustered, )
... you ... I'm grateful to you.
( only then does he fully realize how possibly suggestive the way he rests on his familiar is, and it is like before when hua cheng changed from cat form to this human form: xie lian jerks back, slipping off of him even though it causes that same sting along every line of consciousness, as if to say he should stay close. the longer they are together, and known to each other now as they are, their connection established and open, the farther apart they can be without discomfort. but that will take time, and even then they will likely find it isn't preferable.
sitting beside hua cheng, on his knees, his one trembling and curled in the extra fabric of his robe, xie lian ducks his head, hair spilling over his shoulder and forward. behind him his other hand curls around his ankle, feeling how it still pulses and wondering if he should be worried. he was supposed to report to jun wu after the second time he was denounced and exiled. such was their private agreement. but he hasn't. choosing instead to go on alone as much as he can. he has caused enough trouble for others, and much of it he could not even fix. he doesn't entirely understand all the proprieties of the shackles. would jun wu have felt that as the one who bound him? he isn't sure.
he shakes his head. what happens, happens.
more importantly...he takes a deep breath, pushing away the dizziness spells, he ends up staring at hua cheng again, taking in how he looks and then wondering when he has ever seen someone this eye catching. probably never. his ears burn, but he smiles at him, truly as grateful as he says and still embarrassingly fond. this time, he lifts the hand from where it's thoroughly crumpled his own robe, only to reach out and pat hua cheng's head, then gently through his hair and again behind his ear. he lets it travel down a little, petting the side of his neck as he would do for him in his cat form, gentle: you did nothing wrong, don't worry. )
no subject
that said, even then, his hand continues to pet through hua cheng's hair, some unconscious and determined desire to soothe. he only stumbles in it when he hears those words, and it is enough to ignore the repeated feeling of no in his blood and nerves as he sits up, which somehow ends with his knees on either side of hua cheng's waist. both of his hands are careful to avoid his hair this time, braced shakily on either side of his head as he looks at him, not frowning exactly but a little sad. it's an odd look probably, because his skin remains flushed pink and his eyes a little blown out, feverish with magic, their connection, and a physical longing so foreign to him he can't even name it.
but his focus is xiao hua. hua cheng. punish? he shifts more of his weight to one hand so he can use the other to, as if hua cheng were very fragile, traipse his fingertips down his jaw and then just frame his face. )
Why would I punish you? You're not lacking at all. Xiao H-- er... Hua Cheng, ( he blushes new when he says his name proper again, because he can feel the thrum of pleasure it induces both ways. his hand stays on his face but his gaze averts, murmuring, a bit flustered, )
... you ... I'm grateful to you.
( only then does he fully realize how possibly suggestive the way he rests on his familiar is, and it is like before when hua cheng changed from cat form to this human form: xie lian jerks back, slipping off of him even though it causes that same sting along every line of consciousness, as if to say he should stay close. the longer they are together, and known to each other now as they are, their connection established and open, the farther apart they can be without discomfort. but that will take time, and even then they will likely find it isn't preferable.
sitting beside hua cheng, on his knees, his one trembling and curled in the extra fabric of his robe, xie lian ducks his head, hair spilling over his shoulder and forward. behind him his other hand curls around his ankle, feeling how it still pulses and wondering if he should be worried. he was supposed to report to jun wu after the second time he was denounced and exiled. such was their private agreement. but he hasn't. choosing instead to go on alone as much as he can. he has caused enough trouble for others, and much of it he could not even fix. he doesn't entirely understand all the proprieties of the shackles. would jun wu have felt that as the one who bound him? he isn't sure.
he shakes his head. what happens, happens.
more importantly...he takes a deep breath, pushing away the dizziness spells, he ends up staring at hua cheng again, taking in how he looks and then wondering when he has ever seen someone this eye catching. probably never. his ears burn, but he smiles at him, truly as grateful as he says and still embarrassingly fond. this time, he lifts the hand from where it's thoroughly crumpled his own robe, only to reach out and pat hua cheng's head, then gently through his hair and again behind his ear. he lets it travel down a little, petting the side of his neck as he would do for him in his cat form, gentle: you did nothing wrong, don't worry. )