[ It's a few hours they've been walking on this field, gathering herbs to be turned into concoctions or dried. Hua Cheng stands far from Xie Lian, nearly the most distance he can keep without their bodies physically hurting. The discomfort is there, prickles at his soul like pins and needles, cries softly in the back of his mind, but the familiar pretends he can't feel it. It's better not to be too close, it's surely what Xie Lian prefers.
Nothing has technically changed ever since that day Hua Cheng lost control on his powers, the shock and misery of having to see a statue of misfortune breaking him despite his years. Yet, his bond with Xie Lian doesn't feel the same anymore. It's like walking on the same path you know, but suddenly the surroundings are blurry, and an unsettling quietness lingers all around. It's not like Xie Lian has been keeping him out, their connection lingers, and yet Hua Cheng cannot reach the same depth, like the other is keeping him at a safe distance.
His familiar cannot blame him, that day is a mixture of fractured memories and instinctive decisions, not necessarily right. He decided to worship Xie Lian and show him how pleasure felt like, given by someone who cares earnestly about him, someone who wants him free of constraints, unlike Jun Wu. But it was a one-sided decision. Xie Lian had never asked.
Maybe Xie Lian thought him out of place, or blasphemous. Maybe Xie Lian loves Jun Wu better than his familiar and would rather follow his teachings, with how long the sovereign has been around his master βhe hasn't realized, after all, how many times he'd met Hua Cheng before, in a variety of different faces, and the younger doesn't mean to tell him. Hua Cheng knows that he should be thankful: Xie Lian in his graciousness has decided not to scold or punish him, simply keep him a little further. But he finds himself selfish and he hasn't been able to control the sadness that's infected his mood recently.
He has retreated into his mind, concerned about his every action and how it'll be read, growing if not timid, conscious, self-despisal flared up in return for what he perceives like rejection. He's quiet as his gaze goes through the grass and wild flowers, looking for medicinal ones, not even caring about the drizzle that's growing more insistent by the minute. He hasn't even resorted to magic and his long hair has grown shiny and damp, his red robes darker in a few spots.
His boots jingle at each careful step, until he stops and crouches by a white flower, shielding it with his large hand. It reminds him of a certain someone who's not far, gathering herbs in a basket. He smiles and caresses its petals with a finger, infusing it with magic to ensure its well-being, before he sighs and reaches to pluck closeby dandelions, rubbing wet soil from the roots. His fingers are plenty dirty and smeared with mud by the time he reaches Xie Lian. ]
Gege, I found dandelions for tea. Both flowers and roots. I'm sure you'll be able to trade it easily. [ He smiles sweetly as he places them in the basket, not giving any reaction even as their bond tingles with relief. His gaze sweeps over the thin chain around the other's graceful neck, carrying the ring that he had the older find the day after their shared affection. His master has never taken it off since, despite not knowing its meaning.
Hua Cheng looks down and away, not even catching Xie Lian's eyes despite yearning for it, scared what he'd find there. He asks, obedient and well-behaved: ] What else do you need?
( familiar verse | gathering herbs )
Nothing has technically changed ever since that day Hua Cheng lost control on his powers, the shock and misery of having to see a statue of misfortune breaking him despite his years. Yet, his bond with Xie Lian doesn't feel the same anymore. It's like walking on the same path you know, but suddenly the surroundings are blurry, and an unsettling quietness lingers all around. It's not like Xie Lian has been keeping him out, their connection lingers, and yet Hua Cheng cannot reach the same depth, like the other is keeping him at a safe distance.
His familiar cannot blame him, that day is a mixture of fractured memories and instinctive decisions, not necessarily right. He decided to worship Xie Lian and show him how pleasure felt like, given by someone who cares earnestly about him, someone who wants him free of constraints, unlike Jun Wu. But it was a one-sided decision. Xie Lian had never asked.
Maybe Xie Lian thought him out of place, or blasphemous. Maybe Xie Lian loves Jun Wu better than his familiar and would rather follow his teachings, with how long the sovereign has been around his master βhe hasn't realized, after all, how many times he'd met Hua Cheng before, in a variety of different faces, and the younger doesn't mean to tell him. Hua Cheng knows that he should be thankful: Xie Lian in his graciousness has decided not to scold or punish him, simply keep him a little further. But he finds himself selfish and he hasn't been able to control the sadness that's infected his mood recently.
He has retreated into his mind, concerned about his every action and how it'll be read, growing if not timid, conscious, self-despisal flared up in return for what he perceives like rejection. He's quiet as his gaze goes through the grass and wild flowers, looking for medicinal ones, not even caring about the drizzle that's growing more insistent by the minute. He hasn't even resorted to magic and his long hair has grown shiny and damp, his red robes darker in a few spots.
His boots jingle at each careful step, until he stops and crouches by a white flower, shielding it with his large hand. It reminds him of a certain someone who's not far, gathering herbs in a basket. He smiles and caresses its petals with a finger, infusing it with magic to ensure its well-being, before he sighs and reaches to pluck closeby dandelions, rubbing wet soil from the roots. His fingers are plenty dirty and smeared with mud by the time he reaches Xie Lian. ]
Gege, I found dandelions for tea. Both flowers and roots. I'm sure you'll be able to trade it easily. [ He smiles sweetly as he places them in the basket, not giving any reaction even as their bond tingles with relief. His gaze sweeps over the thin chain around the other's graceful neck, carrying the ring that he had the older find the day after their shared affection. His master has never taken it off since, despite not knowing its meaning.
Hua Cheng looks down and away, not even catching Xie Lian's eyes despite yearning for it, scared what he'd find there. He asks, obedient and well-behaved: ] What else do you need?